Hi. My name is Amy. I’m a 33 year old woman. I am honestly creating this blog, because I have depression and want to document my journey in becoming a healthier and happier person. I guarantee it will probably not be anything like Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project. For one, she doesn’t have depression and two, she’s super organized! But it will be like mine. Unique. I would like to be accountable for something, inspire and empower others, and document my progress.
So about me. Well, let’s see. There are negatives and the positives.
The negatives: I am on disability for depression and anxiety, I don’t have a boyfriend / husband / partner, I don’t really have a lot of friends at this time in my life, I live with my parents, I don’t have a job.
The positives: The above negatives can all be turned into positives, I believe. I am also working to change my situation, so that I will someday not only work, but have a profession, etc etc. I have more self help books than the average person would probably want to admit, and I read them. A lot of people have told me they think I should be a counselor. I take this as a huge compliment, especially since its something I think about doing. I like to doodle and draw, dance, learn new things, read, listen to music, walk in nature, laugh. I am currently working on and succeeding at getting out of my house to do things in the real world. These are things like attending a meditation group (which in turn, has gotten me meditating on my own time), attending a knitting group, trying to go to more meet up group outings, going to a dance class, and pondering doing other things I don’t quite feel ready for. I’m in therapy, I am also a regular at a mental health online forum. I’m putting in volunteer applications and following up with said applications.
I am not perfect, and while I love therapy, I think that change starts with me. I recently ended a (best) friendship with someone who is also an ex of mine. It was difficult and left me a mess at first. But I am realizing I can survive without him, and ultimately, I deserve better. I can be really hard on myself. Scratch that, I am really hard on myself. I’m working on this. I am also trying to be more mindful of my emotional reactivity online and with my family. I tend to resist social things, quite a bit. And, while I don’t really know *why* I do this, I know I’ve been doing it for a long time, it’s a habit of sorts probably, and that it is good / healthy for me to do social things usually. I am most probably an introvert, but when I’m alone for too long, I get even more depressed. Unless I’m overwhelmed (which, I can be) it’s best to push / nudge myself to go to these things.
Welcome to my blog! I intend to blog everyday at 5 pm. See you tomorrow 🙂